He's Not Gone
by Kittie1
Summary: After SmokeScreens Death, Hot Shot is holding a gun that once belonged to SmokeScreen. Will he pull the trigger?


He's Not Gone  
He's not gone.  
  
I won't believe it.  
  
Damn you Primus. You took him too soon!  
  
He just got here and then you decided to play your Trump Card....  
  
Hot Shot curled up on his recharge berth, his optics streaming cleanser fluid, his face twisted into a grimace. 'Why didn't he just stay DOWN!'His mind screamed. He clenched his body tighter together in a ball. He slowly began to rock back and forth. Flashback and vignettes flashed though his mind.  
  
Blink  
  
"Hey Hot Shot! I got your back!"  
  
Blink  
  
"Sorry I took so long to get here. But I'm ready for duty."  
  
Blink  
  
"I'm here for ya Hot Shot!"  
  
Blink  
  
"And hey look, I got a hitch hiker! I call him Liftor!"  
  
Blink  
  
"Prepare to be blasted back to Cybertron!"  
  
Blink  
  
"I tried....to hold them off..."  
  
Blink Blink  
  
In the darkness of his room, Hot Shot crumbled.  
  
Red Alert cast another worried glance to the kids. Alexis still had her head buried in her hands, Rad, had his arms around her, stroking the back of her head. Fred clung to Billy, sobbing widly. Carlos stood to one side, his hands clenched into fists, biting his lower lip and squeezing his eyes shut. Rad lay a hand on his friends shoulder, and Carlos fianally cracked. He sank to his knees and buried his head in his knees.  
  
"Red Alert? Are you alright?"The deep voice came from Scavenger. His deep yellow optics were his main souce for his emotions, and right now they were brimming in agony.  
  
"I'm alright. It's the kids, Liftor....and Hot Shot I'm worried about."  
  
Scavenger nodded solemly. "Its alright though. We all miss him. None of us can help it.". He waited untill the medic nodded, before turning and walking down the hall.  
  
"He's not gone...he's not gone...he's not gone...."Hot Shot continued to chant this new mantra like a lifeline, squeezing his optics tightly. Fluid still trickled out behind the closed lids no matter what. Too much, this was all just too much! SmokeScreen COULDN'T be dead! He couldn't be! "He's not gone...he's not gone...."He whispered again. He rememberd all the times on Cybertron, how they'd trained together. All those night spent up late talking about FemmeBots and their first time drinking the High Grade Energon, and ran naked though out AutoBot City. He smiled at the look on their superiors face that night. It quickly faded when he rememberd all the good times here and now. The look on SmokeScreens face haunted him. It ate away at him, tore at him ravenously. He opened his optics and they fell on his blaster on his side table. Should he....  
  
"Hey Op." Optimus look up at the fake cheeriness that was JetFire. His Second in Command was trying his damnedness to not let the death of SmokeScreen get to him.  
  
"Hello JetFire. What brings you here?" He could not hide the strain of sadness in his voice. His optics held the tell tale sign of agony, and his face masked companion knew it all too well.  
  
"You miss him too huh. Listen Optimus, I know that you've been in here, feigin' that 'I'm the Big BadAss Leader' thing. Trying to fill out the forms to send back to Cybertron. When you've been kicking yourself over SmokeScreen. His deaths' touch us all in a not so pleasant way and I know its affected you on the top three. Your a leader. But your also a friend. And you have the right to express your emotions just like the rest of us."  
  
JetFires words stung. Almost as much as when he'd held up the melting remains of SmokeScreen as his crimson optics began to fade. And then his entire body had gone limp. Dead. Dead like Elita. Dead like all the emotions that he'd been forced to shove in the back pocket of his life. Dead like the husk of the Transformer in the Mourge. Dead like the once bright optics of Liftor. The kids. And HotShot.....HOTSHOT! He jumped up so fast from his office chair it fell over with a clang. "JetFire where's HotShot?!". His spark sank when his Second in Command shrugged.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Don't you understand?! HotShot was SmokeScreens best friend and battle companion! If he's left alone in the state he was in...."He trailed off, letting the other think it out for himself.  
  
"Oh shit!"  
  
HotShot toyed with the blaster in his grey hands. It was a nice weapon. All shiny in the dim lights. A few lights flipped on and off, showing it was fully charged. Ready to sear hot plasma into its chosen target.  
  
It had been SmokeScreens.  
  
He had found it after Prime had taken SmokeScreen to the Mourge. All nice lying there in the mixure of melted metal, orange paint and energon. Not a mark on it. It was still warm from being in SmokeScreens sub space pocket when he'd picked it up. Slowly, he stood up and walked to the center of his room.  
  
He was tired of the fighting. He was tired of the constant war. He was tired of loosing the ones he loved.  
  
HotShot raised the blaster to his temple. His hands were shaking so badly, he could hardly hold the weapon straight. He choked off another sob. He moved the weapon down over his spark core. Then activated his commlink to the entire base. :I'm sorry, SideSwipe. Looks like someone else has to be 'Big Brother' form now on. I'm sorry for failing you, Scavenger. I guess I can't keep that leg up any longer. I'm sorry for being such a pain all the time Red Alert. And for crashing the computer all the time with my Western movies. I'm sorry I wasn't a good enough partner to you Jolt. We had some good times though...right? Hey, Blurr, sorry for what ever I did in the past to piss ya off, alright? Watch out for SideSwipe for me. He needs a good older brother. I'm sorry kids. I wish you didn't get roped into this whole fighting thing. Now I guess you understand the whole Life/Death concept right? Keep up the good work JetFire. But I don't wanna have to come back to kick your ass when you go asteriod hopping agian. And Prime....Primus....I'm sorry. I just can't take the fighting anymore....:  
  
Hot Shot closed his eyes, and pulled the trigger.  
  
'I'm commin' SmokeScreen'  
  
Blink  
  
"Hey HotShot! Wanna go do something?"  
  
Blink  
  
"I've decided to go all out on this war thing. You game 'Shot?"  
  
Blink  
  
"We're gonna get through this thing together or we're gonna die together you hear me!?"  
  
Blink  
  
"Sweet ride RedAlert! I'm outta here!"  
  
Blink  
  
"Yup! I'm back at 100 percent! Dow!"  
  
Blink Blink  
  
In the shooting range behind the base, SideSwipe heard HotShot, and abruptly his jaw dropped. :I'm sorry, SideSwipe. Looks like someone else has to be 'Big Brother' form now on.:  
  
In the SIM room, Scavenger heard HotShot, and his optics filled with that same restrained agony. :I'm sorry for failing you, Scavenger. I guess I can't keep that leg up any longer."  
  
In the main console room, Red Alert heard HotShot, and he dropped his tools. :I'm sorry for being such a pain all the time Red Alert. And for crashing the computer all the time with my Western movies.:  
  
In the shared room of the Mini-Cons, where they were consoling Liftor, they all heard HotShot, and Jolt fell to his knees, screaming in his short beeps and clicks. :I'm sorry I wasn't a good enough partner to you Jolt. We had some good times though...right?:  
  
In his quaters, where Blurr sat polishing his prized rifle, his optics abruptly darkened at what he heard. :Hey, Blurr, sorry for what ever I did in the past to piss ya off, alright? Watch out for SideSwipe for me. He needs a good older brother.:  
  
Each of the kids, in their own small knot, clung to each other again. Fresh tears sprung to their eyes. :I'm sorry kids. I wish you didn't get roped into this whole fighting thing. Now I guess you understand the whole Life/Death concept right?:  
  
JetFire, in his private quaters looked up. :Keep up the good work JetFire. But I don't wanna have to come back to kick your ass when you go asteriod hopping agian.:  
  
Prime looked up, form running to find the yellow warrior. "Please God no..." :And Prime....Primus....I'm sorry. I just can't take the fighting anymore....:  
  
Then the signal abruptly cut with the sound of a gunshot.  
  
HotShots optics dimmed, and he fellt to the floor.  
  
"Here I come...buddy." Then he lay still.  
AN: I felt like wrighting this after seeing Sacrifice, and I must say, it moved me alot. By the end of the episode, I was crying my eyes out. And I kept thinking, 'He can't be dead, he can't be dead'. It was really disturbing. SmokeScreen played a vital part in the AutoBot army, like digging out RedAlert in Vacation, saving the kids in Underground. Saving the kids (agian) in Ruin. And has kicked Royal Decepticon Ass more times then I can count. But he died with honor, and it chokes me up to see him go. But I know that he'll be comming back! I mean, next saturdays episode is called 'Regeneration' don't that hint a little of SOMETHING?! But still, SmokeScreen died with honor and went down swinging. And for that, I give him my own little salute and 21 gun. This episode won't leave my mind for a while. Not to mention I was depressed when I saw the episode anyway. So tell me if I should make a sequel or not k? ~BlurrsBabe/Kittie~ 


End file.
